Wednesday, May 25, 2011
As anyone who has gone through the process knows, a ceremony and celebration is the means by which we take what has been a rather private and personal relationship-building, and run it up the flagpole to fly in a rather public way. We are inviting others--friends, family, coworkers, complete strangers--into our world on an intimate level. Cool? Yes, but nerve wracking too!
Besides all the gooey commitment part, there is the simple fact that, as Teri likes to point out, this is mostly a big party. That's where the fun and exciting part comes in! Since my thirteen-year-older's reading of Margaret Mead, I have been fascinated with ritual, celebrations and milestones on a cultural level. To paraphrase one of our daughters, I love me some good parties! From the planning to the food preparation to the final clean-up--it is something I enjoy immensely.
So, we've got excitement and I know that for Teri, hearing about and sharing in other people's excitement about our celebration has been validating and inspiring; and we've got some frustration and disappointment and worry; we've also got love and silliness and humor and some hurt feelings and nerves. We wrestle with triggers and annoyances and self-doubt while also feeling studly and accomplished. There are the sweet moments where we admire our rings or imagine what we will say to our kids during a toast, and there are crabby moments when we disagree or forget or overlook.
It is a salad--an eighty-days-left-emotional-wedding salad. Can someone please pass the dressing?